Thursday, October 11, 2007

My Brave Baby & Her Big Badonkadonk

Strange thing happened Tuesday night...

It started off normal enough. Dad made a yummy pot roast, which was of course enjoyed by the entire family. I had received my new "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Seasons 1 & 2" DVD set, and we brought it down to watch with Dad, since he seems to dig the show.

After about an hour of eating copious amounts of beef and partaking in general frivolity, the strange thing happened: Annie, the intrepid cat-about-town who fears nothing, got very tense & her tail bushed up to about 4 times its normal size. I couldn't understand why she would react that way - she's had words with my parents' 2 cats before, but she's hardly afraid of them. She usually just ignores them unless she wants to play, and then she beats them up. If anything, they should be scared of her.

And then we realized what had caused this reaction: Blackie, the behemoth who lives in our upstairs bedroom, who has never set so much as a pinky claw on the stairs, was darting very gingerly around our family room. I guess that after 2 1/2 years of having to hear us have fun down there without her, she finally grew a pair & decided to see what she's been missing. She didn't stay long, but she made 2 more quick return trips, sort of like reconnaissance missions.

I'm still not certain why this spooked her sister Annie so much - They get along fine together. I think she was just startled, as were the rest of us. I never thought Blackie would muster up the courage for such a bold move. I'm so proud! Of course, now she's all full of herself (and there's a LOT of herself to be full of) and thinks that, because she had the nerve to conquer the downstairs, she has the guts to try the jump to our plant shelf along the vaulted ceiling. Annie does this with ease on a daily basis, and it's been really irritating Blackie that she can't do it, too.

The problem is that Blackie, while remarkably agile for a 25 pound cat, has no chance of making it onto that shelf. The only way up is a steep vertical jump, after which she would have to use her front legs to pull the rest of her onto the shelf. This, I believe, is a physical impossibility. Her back end is easily 3 times the size of her front. All other attempts at similar vertical jumps have ended with her reaching her goal, only to be pulled back down by her giant ass end - as I've noted before, she's like a big furry Slinky.

So far, she hasn't been very receptive to my suggestions that lack of nerve was not the true obstacle to her jump; rather, the real obstacle is her big black badonkadonk. Maybe badonkadonk translates differently in cat... or maybe she's just like every other girl I know & is in denial about how big her butt is. In any case, she is not to be dissuaded from her goal, so I'll keep you posted on her progress.

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